Really?

As I experience these last few weeks...or days....or pregnancy, I am conscience of how crazy I really am feeling. Granted, there has to be so many hormones flying around inside of me, preparing for delivery and nursing and all kinds of stuff, that I really do think I have an "excuse" or two. :) But, seriously, the things that I can think and say all in the same 24 hour period are really mind boggling.

For example, last night I was having sharp pains in the middle of the night and I wondered - "Are these contractions?" Then I started feeling scared thinking, "Oh man! These hurt! It will hurt even more. I don't want to do this; not yet!"

A mere 6 hours later I felt so hot and tired and tight that I told Nathan I would be happy to be right at the pushing stage; no matter what the pain!

Then I was feeling super cute in my maternity clothes, and enjoying all the funny stares and fun pregnancy stuff that you experience when people know you are pregnant. I kept reminding myself how awesome it is to have big kids, and how I want to just have the best last 2 weeks with my babies now and enjoy being pregnant.

A few hours later I was thinking...."Will this baby ever come? I can't wait to meet it and I am sooo tired of being pregnant. Never doing this again. Never!"

You think reading this is crazy? Try being Nathan - the poor guy has to listen to each of these monologues every day, and he is SO patient. Occasionally he does tell me that I'm insane - but, I'd have to agree.